Who is War Hawk Tanzania, dunno but that name is FEROCIOUS! Let's find out together shall we?
The music shifts from no wave to Barry White"s Love Unlimited style strings.
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| Warhawk is also my porn nom deplume! |
War hawk’s fro and droopy stache reminds me of a less attractive Lionel Ritchie. Warhawk or Luke Curtis trains to fight with his squirrely bro Chris played by Larry Fleischman. That aforementioned actor was in The Warriors PS2 video game as a back round police officer. Good for Larry I say!
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| ICE decided to detain all of us based on nothing! |
There’s all kinds of Chinese cave hijinx and flute music. Don’t look now but there’s a creature lurking in the forrest! I was waiting for a Gilman type monster to burst out already! It doesn’t quite happen though. We see an Asian man wonder around by traffic with giant white eyes painted over his! For a second I thought Larry Buchanan ghost directed this!
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| Larry paid me in day old circus peanuts |
Warhawk's partner Chris kind of resembles Raoul from the Wild Kingdom segment of that UHF (1989) Weird Al movie.
A bunch of Noo Yawk cops show up complete with phones and typewriter sounds. The main pig thinks Black and Chinese gangs are beefin’, duh ya think?
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| Looks like we got another one of those long hard ones (and that's how we like it)! |
An Ed Macmahon looking honky wanders into a subway after hearing a creepy AI sounding voice. Wouldn’t you know, Brother Theodore star of The Burbs (1989) and Letterman appearances is among the police. Brother T is shockingly quiet, I mean it’s unsettling! I'm so used to him screaming his brains out!
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| How come no one wants my autograph? |
I originally heard about this movie when it was trashed in Bad Azz Mofo zine by David Walker. I once saw him talk about blaxploitation films and show clips at a Humanist church in Oakland Ca. Badazz Mofo was an influence on my writing for sure! The cops in Devil's Express all look like a hybrid of Tackleberry and Mauser if they mated. A bag lady with no brain filter faints after seeing a headless body on the subway. One thing I find irritating is how they only show the havok the monster inflicts but we never see the beast itself. OK Maybe we do see a grey dude in a shitty mask but that's not enough closure for some of us pickier film goers, sorry! My guess is that they had no money in the effects budget.
This movie is at least half as entertaining and unintentionally funny as Bare Knuckles (1977) or a 5 pack of Chuck Norris flix!
AVAILABLE TO STREAM ON TUBI (for a limited time).
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