The Legendary Stardust Brothers

 

Legend of the Stardust brothers (星くず兄弟の伝説, Hoshikuzu kyôdai no densetsu) When my best pal Goat Scrote, who is a Mosquito the Rapist merit badge winning champ and I saw this film together, we knew this was a major crowd pleaser. In case you forgot, read Goat’s review of the dreaded aforementioned film click this link. 

Then my birthday rolled around and I knew Stardust Bros was thee movie others had to fuggin see to believe. Yes, it’s that good. If you are a fan of musicals or even if you aren't, fear not this movie covers all bases and will win you over. There’s even a snappy peppy number with the bloated corpse of Hitler. Yowie Zowie! 

My advice is to gather your more adventurous film nerd pals and get baked or drunk and crank this shit up! It starts off in B&W, next the brothers dance in unison and boast that 2 yrs ago they hit rock bottom. They are super flashy and their song is insanely infectious. Their names are Shingo (Shingo Kubota) and Kan (Kan Takagi).

Kan is the androgynous one

There’s lots of Japanese Punkers and chipper girls, zombies and animated parts. The main singer of London Boots wears a Degrassi (1987-89) Joey Jeremiah style hat. He breaks into a fake Wham! sounding earnest number. This is Shingo, future brother of Kan's former band. 

    Zit Remedy? More like Shit Remedy!

I like the business deal location area which looks like an abandoned high school. Two thug punks guard the studio with chains and bats. Kan and Shingo meet Turtle, a petite little cutie who’s tougher than she looks. She is played by Kyoko Togawa.

There's got to be a morning after....

This movie is part Wizard of Oz and Eastern Phantom of the Paradise but that’s not even scratching the surface. There are lots of songs, better than VH1 type rock band montages most tunes are fun as hell but later on the drama hits hard. The three band members meet a slick mutton chopped label head who’s look reminded me of Jim Jones (who was a big Elvis fan too). He goes into a new wave ditty that’s like Valley Girl and the makeover scene in WOZ. 

don't worry Japanese Kool-Aid is safe.

There’s also the obvious nod to A Hard Day’s Night. The band explodes in popularity as the executive with glasses and mutton chops sings the plot points. The Bros sing about how shitty it is to be famous with a sheer brilliant take on MTV style crash and burn out. 

STARDUST-MANIA

They all sing and dance on various sets and finally down a long staircase. There’s a moody Goth number that mentions credit cards being maxed out and cheating. There’s an insane song that ignites after Shingo’s temporary white girlfriend lights up his cig. 

LSB has zombies, stop motion creatures, mummies, it packs so much entertainment value in. A haunted nurse with a giant syringe causes the Dust bros to fly through another highly entertaining acid trip through time space and animation. Drop the orange sunshine already! Like Dr. Pretorius says to Crawford in From Beyond let the pineal gland party "Let it happen".

No I won't sign Robert Englund autographs

This aforementioned scene is a short clip you could use to whet someone’s appetite that may be on the fence about Asian films of this ilk. This film is very unique and should be in the Destroy All Movies book for its punk ascetic. The ska number with a Morricone adjacent organ solo is just bonkers in the best way.

I beat Liquid Television's dead ass!

One night the female character goes on stage instead of the Dust bros. Her song is one of my favorites. It has 2 keytars and is catchy AF. Marimo the former little turtle has surpassed the Stardust bros in fame and worst of all she is being chased by a goth rocker. He sings about how tanned skin is already out of season. 

Arm LBGTQ plus now!

This movie demands for you to be under the influence so light up with whatever you got and enjoy the buzz. This was a recent find and I remember the Alamo Drafthouse in SF played it but I never heard of it or maybe just forgot. It’s astoundingly fun, the songs are great and it was all inspired by Winslow Leach of Phantom of the Paradise fame and most likely Paul Williams. Oh, and don’t miss the ending which marks a disturbing cameo by Hitler.

LSB IS ALL THAT AND A BAG OF WASABI SHRIMP CHIPS

You can watch it on TUBI! (Note Tubi is connected to Fox News which makes all us Liberals feel dirty while I doubt Conservatives care this much about cult films). At any rate that channel always has something from all the companies cult movie fanatics tend to buy. Severin, Alamo Drafthouse, AGFA, Blue Underground, Shout Factory and Contv.