Vendetta

Vendetta Directed By Tony Leung Siu-Hung, Starring Kent "Fatty" Cheng Jak-Si (1993). 

--Review by Goat Scrote--

     This is a goofy and violent Hong Kong supernatural flick. Elevator pitch? Home Alone meets The Omen, with a dash of HK crime-movie action for flavor. I had fun watching it, although it’s not as bloody, raunchy, or effects-laden as I expected and there’s no particular quality of the film that really stands out. It’s a pleasant diversion for fans of this kind of thing, but it’s not worth going too far out of your way for it.

     The movie centers around clean-cut pregnant couple Kitty (Linda Liu Shui-Chi) and David. David (Ray Lui Leung-Wai) is a cop, and in the line of duty he faces off with a trio of crazed thugs. The evil trio is a family, two brothers and a sister. I can only imagine the kind of parenting that led up to this senseless killing and looting spree. The thugs take hostages and end up surrounded by police. Just to be dicks, they pitch one of the hostages out a high window! A bloody slapstick gunfight follows and the two youngest thugs end up spectacularly dead at the hands of the young cop.

you've broken the windows with that nuclear fart!

     David sees phantoms of the dead duo, covered in blood, lurking in the hospital where his wife is delivering twins.  The cop has a vision of the killers taunting him from his children’s cribs. Animals go insane or simply drop dead when the babies are brought near. It seems clear that the children are possessed by vengeful ghosts.

no it's a homicidal infant!

     As Cindy (Cheng Chong) and Tony (Leung Sap-Yat) grow up they seem mostly normal, except they both have birthmarks on the forehead in the same spots where their father shot the thugs. They aren’t very nice to their dad, either. When they get a little older they begin trying to “accidentally” kill him. They manage to inflict a variety of minor injuries. Then they puncture one of his eardrums so he goes deaf in that ear. The husband finally recognizes that his own spawn really are out to get him, but his wife still won’t accept that.

Maybe you're just a shitty father?

     Meanwhile in prison the eldest brother, Hung Long (ha!) bites the fingers off a guard. He later uses the poor nine-fingered bastard’s wedding ring to pick a lock and attack more guards. When the TV news reports his escape, the little kids cheer and celebrate.

YAY! Our real dad is coming to bite off other appendages

     The cops find Hung Long (Tommy Wong Kwong-Leung), but he slaughters them and gets away. David manages to survive thanks to his bulletproof vest. Afterwards he carelessly leaves his gun laying around and takes a nap. The kids find it and nearly manage to take him out. He knows they are possessed, but he doesn’t know what to do about it. To make matters worse, he finds the corpse of his best friend, murdered and mutilated by Hung Long, who is looking for revenge.

TEAMWORK!

     The kids are acting creepy as usual, and Mom ends up taking a tumble down the stairs and going to the hospital. Dad sets an improvised bomb in the kid’s room rigged to the light switch and sets other deathtraps around the house to prepare for Hung Long’s arrival. He locks the kids in their room and visits the hospital, which gives Hung Long an opportunity to get into the house and wait for him.

Yeah you need to go on a diet like me!

     The two get into an extended fight which ends when Long gets blown up. David pulls his dead children from the wreckage. They are both saved when his tears fall on their magic birthmarks. Lightning strikes all three of them, and the evil spirits are driven out of his kids, along with the birthmarks. They awaken, call him Daddy, and the credits roll.

Millie Vanilli were right, the rain does have magical powers!

     The version I saw was presented in four languages simultaneously. It had two sets of subtitles and each of the stereo tracks was in a different language. That was a little off-putting but the action made up for the confusing aural experience and the subtitle text running off the bottom of the screen now and then. Editor Notes: This one is a super rare VCD that Skunkape had to smuggle out of some treacherous locations, risking life and limb to procure a copy. A few years ago we reviewed a WIP title called Vendetta that's probably on par with the action in this flick and thankfully there's no scene with Sandy Martin hiding contraband in her cooch! There are seriously too many movies with this title, this one and the Bruce Logan film are my favorites.   


SORRY NO LINK (extremely rare film)