I Like To Hurt People

I Like To Hurt People Directed By Donald G. Jackson (1974).

You might be scratching you're head and thinking what has happened to Theater Of Guts? These wimps have sold out, what are they doing reviewing a dumb wrestling movie from the mid 70's or interviewing a guy who made a documentary about Christmas songs? We like to branch out from time to time, who doesn't? Sometimes we get bored too, but fear not, the carnage will resume later! 

I like Limburger cheese!

   For now relax and kick back with an ice cold Bud in the can and prepare you're self for wrassling and trashy hicks courtesy of Mr. "Frog town himself, Donald G. Jackson! 

   Feast your eyes on some prime footage of  the 70's classic roster of American superheroes like Dusty Rhodes, Andre The Giant, Terry Funk, Abdullah The Butcher and Ox Baker from Escape From New York.

   There's something authentically Spinal Tap about the whole sha-bang, from the ear-splitting metal to the improv stylizings of random people they stuck twenty bucks into their pocket to "act". 

   The man who likes to "Hurt People" is The Sheik (not the Iron one, just plain Sheik or Ed Farhat), his song goes "They call me Mr. Cool shoes…" 

   A lot of these unfamiliar wrestlers remind me of Mike Tyson's Punch Out villains like Mr. Sandman and Von Kaiser.

   There's an Artie Fufkin/ Paul Shaffer type creep slinking around haphazardly trying to slap together a thin story line with bubblegum. I'm betting Jackson would've been fine just playing terrible keyboard driven rockandroll over various matches and clumsy interviews. 

   Then Heather Feather shows up (fresh from a match wrestling a bear) into a tabletop arm battle and later they let her wrestle a man. She's the most fascinating character to me, because I like how she wants to level the sexist playing field.

I want to wrestle a man-bear-pig

   Terry Funk "Mr. Barbara Streisand's Nose" comes in and does a seizure dance, while paramedics take him away. Funk and his brother Dory vow to destroy the Sheik, they should stand in line, everyone wants to kill him. Let me explain that Terry Funk song if I could, it's one of the best/worst novelty songs on that 80's wrestler all star album, it must be heard to be believed!

Pardon me, I gotta go take a shit

 The film is an unintentionally hilarious 70's wrestling time capsule.This was Donald G. Jackson's first film, a few years later he made Demon Lover with Gunnar Hansen. He also worked with James Cameron on Galaxy Of Terror and the original Terminator. 
   I remember seeing this on alot of rare bootleg lists and now it recently showed up on Youtube (it will most likely disappear), if you're like us and dig Andy Kaufman in the ring or enjoy watching hillbillies yell at the screen for an hour and change then check it out!

I killed this snake, it's a calamity!

Have my agent call Rob Reiner

A truckload of bacon has been hijacked, film at 11

This is Brad Delp from Boston, reminding you that charcoal is hazardous